(Or When the Gift Isnât Quite âTheir Thingâ)
This time of year is full of excitement, anticipation⌠and expectations.
Kids imagine gifts, outings, and moments in their heads long before they actually happen. And sometimes, when reality doesnât match the picture they built, disappointment shows up fast. That doesnât mean theyâre ungrateful or spoiled. It means theyâre still learning how to process feelings, expectations, and appreciation all at once.
Gratitude is a skill. And like any skill, it takes time, practice, and gentle guidance.
đ Start With Understanding, Not Correction
When a child doesnât love a gift or feels disappointed, their reaction is usually about feelings, not manners.
They might be:
⢠Overstimulated
⢠Tired
⢠Let down by expectations
⢠Unsure how to respond
Before jumping in with, âSay thank you,â pause and help them name the feeling first.
âItâs okay to feel disappointed.â
Then follow with, âAnd we can still be thankful someone thought of you.â
Both can exist at the same time.
đ Teach the Why Behind âThank Youâ
Gratitude isnât about pretending to love everything. Itâs about recognizing effort.
Help kids understand that:
⢠Someone took time to choose something
⢠Someone spent money they worked for
⢠Someone wanted to make them feel happy
A simple explanation like,
âSaying thank you shows appreciation for the effort, even if the gift isnât perfect,â
goes a long way.
đŹ Practice What to Say (Before the Moment Happens)
Kids do better when theyâre prepared.
Practice phrases like:
⢠âThank you for thinking of me!â
⢠âThat was so kind of you.â
⢠âI appreciate this.â
These phrases acknowledge effort without forcing fake excitement.
đą Model Gratitude in Real Life
Kids learn gratitude by watching it.
Say thank you out loud.
Express appreciation for small things.
Show kindness when things arenât perfect.
When kids see adults respond with grace, they learn that gratitude isnât just for gifts. Itâs a way of treating people.
â¤ď¸ Remember: Gratitude Grows Over Time
No child masters gratitude overnight.
Theyâre learning:
⢠Emotional regulation
⢠Social expectations
⢠Empathy
Every experience is a chance to guide, not shame.
Teaching gratitude isnât about demanding perfect manners in hard moments. Itâs about helping kids understand that effort matters, kindness matters, and people matter.
Especially this time of year, when someone has chosen to give their time, energy, or hard-earned money, gratitude becomes a lesson in empathy.
And the good news?
When we teach gratitude gently, it sticks.
Youâre not raising kids who get it right every time.
Youâre raising kids who are learning.
And thatâs exactly how itâs supposed to be đđ